For Golf Nuts and The Unduly Curious ~only~

For Golf Nuts
The club with the big wood head that I first used to hit golf balls off the deck is a MacGregor Tour Flight 5, with "Lady MacGregor" stenciled across the top of the mallet. (Is there a "Gentleman MacGregor"?) The grip on that club was a bit ookie, as in gummy, so later I switched to another big-headed club, the Grafalloy M29 Boron Graphite Trident Golf 1. I believe these clubs are called drivers, or woods, but have no idea where to put the all-important number that describes them. Should it be a #5 MacGregor Tour Flight? Or a #5 wood, a MacGregor Tour Flight? Ahem, excuse me, a Lady MacGregor...

I have been told that the set of clubs I have (the set that used to belong to my mother, in case you haven't read about the bloomin' golf balls) is a good set. Judge for yourself. A complete list follows.

In the Bag, Part One
Woods or Drivers
1 - Grafalloy M29 Boron Graphite Trident Golf
3 - Grafalloy M29 Boron Graphite Trident Golf
5 - MacGregor Tour Flight

Irons
2 - Betty Hicks Autograph Custom Bilt
3 - Golf
4 - Crown Viper
4 - Lady MacGregor
5 - Golf
6 - Lady MacGregor
7 - Crown Viper
8 - Lady Macgregor
Sand Wedge - Championship Kroydon
Pitching Wedge - Lady MacGregor

The most interesting club is the Betty Hicks. First, because it's the only Betty Hicks in the bunch, and second, it is the only club that is well tarnished, with an old, rusty, put-me-to-rest appearance. The brown leather grip is peeling at the top and is worn away to a rough, fleshy color at the bottom. So I asked about it and yes, it was a well-used club, my mom claiming to have made many a good shot with it. My sister added that nobody uses a 2 iron anymore. Hmmm. Maybe they should...

For The Unduly Curious
Ever been shocked, amused, or amazed by the contents of someone else's wallet, purse, medicine cabinet, or pants pocket? Well, next time you get the chance, check out the debris in a golf bag.

In the Bag, Part Two
16 little pencils, 3 with erasers
4 white paper cups, crumpled
Cutter insect repellent
Keychain flashlight, non-functioning
1 blank scorecard, Chick Evans Golf Course
4 blank scorecards, Wilmette Golf Course
1 blank scorecard, The Tides Inn
4 plastic bags
3 gloves, crumpled
2 tags, The Greenbrier
1 tag, Broadmoor Golf Club
2 tags, Southampton Princess Golf Club
1 tag, La Paloma
1 receipt, Wilmette Golf Course, 9/19/00, 9:37 a.m.
3 Halls mentho-lyptus cough drops, gooey
2 metal shower hooks
4 things I don't know how to describe
10 white golf balls, slightly sticky
1 funny green rubber thing, maybe a training tee?
14 plastic spotters
1 Golf Handicap Information Network card, 1992
46 tees (including 9 from The Greenbrier, 1 from Michigan Shores, 1 from Hertz, and 1 from a "Mr. Ted")
1 quarter

As my sister would say: "What, no grilled cheese?"